I was studying at a coffee shop when I noticed somebody throwing glances at me.
This scenario was all too familiar to me: I’ve heard stories about how the 'trade' works and Ive read it far too often in porn literature (yes, that's my type of porn). After staring at each other for a while, either one is supposed to smile, the other goes to the comfort room or follows suit, and the rest is history. I find these stories fascinating, primarily because they're outside my realm of experience. Do they even really happen in real life?
They probably do, but I stop short of finishing even the first act of staring back. In reference to attempted crimes, some cause or reason other than my own desistance stops me from committing all acts constituting the 'felony'... or maybe I'm restrained by my own desistance. Maybe what I do doesn't even count as an attempt, because I haven't even entered the 'objective' phase of the crime--the initial act of staring back. I'm too, as my friends say, 'conservative'.
Case in point: I've never smoked. I've never been drunk. I call my parents whenever I get home from school and I text them virtually wherever I am. Literally. Although I've admittedly been to a few shady places in the past, I'm generally a prude in the actual meaning of the word.
In my imagination, I would've stared back and something might have happened. In the world of porn literature, he would have given me a really hot blowjob and I would've obliged as well. Maybe we'd even exchange numbers afterwards.
In reality though, what I did was plug my earphones, listened to Chris Garneau in full volume, and read cases until my eyes gave out. I didn't even notice him leaving.
Congratulations, self. You've earned yourself a stalker who would call you every so often, tell you on a daily basis that he dropped by Malcolm and other places you regularly go to, and attempt to even befriend your boyfriend.
I now realize the stupidity of my acts and this time I had to be hard on him: I deleted all traces of him in my life and swore never again to engage in a emotional flattery and flirtation. Lesson learned.
Sometimes a relationship can't go any lower than it already is. And, sometimes, all you need is a date, where silently but surely, every broken piece of your relationship is restored to its original place.
And yeah, I know I promised not to blog, but I figured I deserved some form of material reward after studying so much for the past few days. And because I think I erased the movie I wanted to watch again, I decided to just update instead.